Why Donald Trump Is Right About Healthcare

I can’t believe no one has said it before. Seriously.

Donald Trump; genius

Today, the President of the United States made some truly amazing comments on his notorious twitter feed. No, I’m not talking about his latest attack on those nasty journalists, or even the wonderfully idiosyncratic* promotion of his overseas work.

Trump has come out with an idea that will shake the world to its very foundations;

The Bestest Idea There Ever Was

As someone with a background in health economics and finance, I’m sitting here kicking myself. It’s such a simple idea — and yet so beautiful. Just Add Money, and all of our healthcare worries will go away!

Why didn’t we think of that first?

It’s just so beautiful. Sure, the US already spends more than any other country in the world on healthcare (by a YUUUUGE margin). Sure, adding dollars to the healthcare system has been demonstrated time and again to have a pretty limited impact on people’s health, with the biggest gains coming from efficiencies such as those trialed in the US through the ACA. And of course, adding dollars to the healthcare spend is precisely what The Supreme Leader Donald is not doing.

Wait, where was I?

Oh right, the Beautiful Idea. It’s just so beautiful. It’s the best Idea ever; no one else could ever come up with such an amazing Idea. Americans across the country are going to be proud, they can look at the Idea and say “that’s American”.

I mean, really, who cares about the experts that have demonstrated worldwide that a universal healthcare system actually saves you money in the long run. We all know about so-called “experts” and their “PhDs” or their “decades of experience in reducing the costs of healthcare spending whilst not compromising patient care”.

We’ve got FREEDOM on our side.

And the Beautiful Idea, of course.

Don’t forget the Beautiful Idea. It’s truly beautiful.

The Beautiful Idea is the best idea because not only is healthcare important, but as the President himself knows only too well, spending more on something means it’s better. From toupees to suits, from vacations to living quarters for the family, Trump has shown us time and again that if the American public pay more for it, it must be the best in the world.

And the most Beautiful part of the Beautiful Idea?

It’s great if you’ve got money.

There might be a few people who lose out if we Just Add Money to healthcare, because obviously people who have less (or no) money aren’t going to be able to Just Add Money, but we don’t care about that! Most people are rich people — like the President — and if you’re not rich then you’re probably an immigrant and don’t deserve healthcare anyway.

The Beautiful Idea just keeps looking better.

Let’s hope that the President can implement it soon, without all this fake news from the fake liberal media who write lies about how The Supreme Leader Donald is going to kill people by denying them access to healthcare and then pump the budget full of useless subsidies that make healthcare better if you’ve got the money to pay for it.

Don’t listen to the lies. Listen to the Beautiful Idea. It’s the best, most impressive, large-handed Idea in the history of ideas.

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If anyone is confused this is satire. The idea is idiotic, pointless, stupid, and a whole host of other synonyms for moronic. Simply adding dollars to healthcare is not an effective strategy, and furthermore this is exactly what Trump is not doing.

*Read: grammatically challenged